Ah, so the big day has arrived, you’re finally engaged, and it’s time to pick out a wedding dress! The first thought you have is to bring your best friends and family to help you pick a dress. It’s all so exciting until… you realize everyone is making it about them. So to keep your friends and family in check, here are some tips and tricks written by a bridal consultant, so that you don’t have to tell them:
*Disclaimer: Every bride is different, but as a bridal consultant, these are helpful tips in most scenarios.*
#1: Listen to her.
It’s very overwhelming for a bride-to-be to step foot in a bridal shop. They are suddenly in a big store filled with dresses, and yet they have to narrow it down to one, THE one. That alone is enough pressure, so feel free to make recommendations about different styles she should try, but just remind her that in the end, it’s her choice. When it comes to picking out dresses to try on, let her take the lead. If she says that she doesn’t want to try something on, don’t push her.
#2: Let her form her own opinion.
Don’t give your opinion before the bride says how SHE feels about it, or until she asks you. As a consultant, there have been countless times in which I’ve seen my bride LOVE a dress when she’s in the fitting room, only to hear someone say she “hates it” the second she walks out of the fitting room. The fact that a bride likes a dress doesn’t mean it’s “the one” yet! This just means she likes it or likes something about it. So be open to hearing what she has to say before sharing your two cents. It’s heart-shattering when I know the bride likes a dress, but someone in her group hates it. It makes the bride so upset, and I know that no one wants to see her upset. So just keep in mind to wait a couple of seconds before telling her how you feel about the dress. You may also feel differently about the wedding dress once you hear her say how beautiful she feels in it.
#3: Filter your opinion!
There is definitely a right way and a wrong way to say things. Before you state your opinion, make sure you word it constructively. For example, rather than saying, “I don’t like how fitted dresses look on you,” say, “I think that you looked more radiant in the flowy dresses.” I know this is a difficult exercise, but try to flip your comments into something positive that won’t make her feel self-conscious about anything. When wedding dress shopping, it’s easy for insecurities to get in the way of making a decision. Your job as a friend/family member is to outline her best features without reminding her of her insecurities.
#4: Don’t make it about YOU!
This is HER DAY! Don’t talk about what YOU would do for YOUR wedding. Her bridal appointment is meant to help her identify what’s best for her. Your time will come, or maybe you already had your turn. So, just focus on her because you are both different people, with different preferences.
#5: Take Pictures!
This is a given, and I’m sure you are all excited about this part. Taking pictures and videos helps identify how well the dress is photographed. Not to mention, after the bride picks “the one,” she won’t be able to see it again for another 6-8 months (when the dress comes in)! She’s going to want pictures to look at to remind her of how much she loves the dress.
#6: If she loves the dress, don’t push back.
Feeling that magical “this is the one” moment is so special, so if you see the bride having that moment-DONT RAIN ON HER PARADE! Let her feel all her feelings, and let her enjoy it. Comments like, “I liked the other one better,” or, “We still have other options to look at,” are very upsetting to the bride when she’s already so happy in that dress. As a consultant, I can confirm that when a bride feels that magical bridal moment, there will not be any other dress that compares to that one. Plus, as I mentioned before, it’s HER decision. At the end of it all, you’re not the one walking down the aisle in it. So if she feels beautiful, and she is happy, that is the dress for her!
#7: A Friendly Reminder!
The bride makes the dress beautiful, not the other way around. If the bride feels confident in the dress, she is going to rock the heck out of that dress, and she’ll be unstoppable!
Thank you for taking the time to read this article, and I’m wishing happy supportive shopping to all brides and her bridal party!